Just home from the hospital
JimmyHavok.
Posted to Diary on Tue Apr 08, 2008 at 08:22:12 PM EST. RSS.
According to every test known to man, I am healthy as a horse, however, I just spent two nights in the hospital, because I passed out in the bathroom at home. The doctors finally decided it must have been pressure on my vagus nerve, combined with low blood pressure from getting up from sleep.
I woke up in the middle of the night Monday morning with a horrid pain in my belly, and went to see if I could relieve it in the normal way. The next thing I knew, I was waking from an odd dream with my face on the edge of the sink, and my girlfriend was saying "I just called the ambulance." Despite the wonderful feeling of calm I was experiencing, I thought, "What a good idea...."
So I ended up spending the night in ER, then a day and a night in something called the Diagnostic Care Unit. They put a camera down my gullet, they CT scanned me, they looked at my heart and carotid arteries with ultrasound, and found nothing whatsoever. (Kind of cool to be able to see your own heart pumping.) So after another night in the hospital (my god TV is boring when you have to watch the commercials), trapped on the bed by the leads to a heart monitor that kept beeping because my heart rate is so slow, they finally let me go home today, just in time to get lunch.
But at least I got to tell a lot of different nurses my favorite hospital joke:
Q: Do you know how to tell the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?
A: By the flavor.
Postscript: My girlfriend's father is suffering from a lesion on his foot that just won't heal, and there's some talk of putting him in a care facility for a few weeks if we can't get it closed at home (it's been well over a year now that it's been a problem). After the boredom I suffered in that hospital bed, I don't think I want to do it to him unless there's no other choice.
GTFO My Lawn... My lawn, get off of it. >
