Music

None Hit Blunders

Steve Urkel.

Posted to Music on Thu May 08, 2008 at 05:36:46 PM EST (promoted by port1080). RSS.

Those bands that never quite took off.

Maybe they were ahead of their time. Maybe it was their own fault. Maybe they sucked, but you liked them anyway.

Who are your favorite None Hit Blunders, and why?

Tags: edited by Port1080, written by Steve Urkel, music (all tags)

This story: 17 comments (4 from subqueue)
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5

The Embarrassment

permazorch.

Fri May 09, 2008 at 04:49:32 PM EST

5.00 (informative)

I love The Embarrassment.
For my money, they made the greatest pop music ever to come from Central Standard Time, USA. The only bad thing I can say about them, is they're arguably to blame for R.E.M. and the insipid "college rock" sound that followed their ascent.
But, hell, we don't condemn the awesome beauty of Buddy Holly and the Crickets for the treacly bile of Huey Lewis and the News, do we?

Also, The (Mortal) Micronotz kick ass.

----- The earth may fail, but we will quiver

7

^ 5

Re: The Embarrassment

T Slothrop.

Sat May 10, 2008 at 12:14:09 AM EST

none

Now hold on there, pardner. You did NOT just try to compare REM to Huey Fucking Lewis, however indirectly. Tell me you didn't.

(I didn't find anything particularly "insipid" about college radio in the very early 80's either.)

{Insert amusing quotation here}

10

^ 7

Apologies to T Slothrop. That was wrong of me.

permazorch.

Mon May 12, 2008 at 09:51:34 PM EST

none

Let me fix my comment.
But, hell, we don't condemn the awesome beauty and simple raw power of Buddy Holly and the Crickets for the byzantine overindulgence and navel-gazing of The Beatles, do we?
Sure, I like REM, just fine. But, they just never really thrilled me past my high school obsession with "Murmur". I also enjoy The Beatles, in a kind of that's satisfactory to hear, but it doesn't get me high sort of way. But, I still get a real buzz from just the bridge from both Buddy Holly's 'Oh Boy', and 'Not Fade Away', and those are just off the top of my head.

(I didn't find anything particularly "insipid" about college radio in the very early 80's either.)
College radio wasn't insipid in the very early 80's. It wasn't until 1986 that I saw every other college kid sporting an R.E.M. t-shirt. The thoroughly mediocre "college rock" sound is what followed. I think we all remember the somnambulant horrors of the LATE 1980's. It was e-z listening angst.

----- The earth may fail, but we will quiver

11

^ 10

Re: Apologies to T Slothrop. That was wrong of me.

thefadd.

Mon May 12, 2008 at 11:56:19 PM EST

none

Now I'm really confused. I love REM and didn't take your comment as a dis on them. I completely agree with you on the crap they "inspired."

It is easy to buy small plaster models of what you think life is like.

13

^ 11

Re: Apologies to T Slothrop. That was wrong of me.

permazorch.

Tue May 13, 2008 at 04:29:07 AM EST

5.00 (funny, informative)

I think my problem is that I take my stupid identity too seriously. Music was SO important growing up.
Also, there's something about this TnT that makes me more cautious/polite, and less snotty, 'eh? I don't know.
I like The Beatles more than Elvis.
I like The Rolling Stones exactly as much as I like The Beatles.
I love Buddy Holly and Patsy Cline more than the 3 above.

I like REM.
I like Nirvana a little bit more.
I love The Embarrassment more than those two.

I love plastic and tnt, but I'm weirdly different at each board.

I am actually a monster.

----- The earth may fail, but we will quiver

12

^ 10

Re: Apologies to T Slothrop. That was wrong of me.

T Slothrop.

Tue May 13, 2008 at 01:29:15 AM EST

none

Truly I was kidding. I knew you weren't comparing REM to Huey Lewis. I guess we need a "mock outrage" tag.

And yes, college radio in the late 80's was indescribably awful.

{Insert amusing quotation here}

14

^ 12

Re: Apologies to T Slothrop. That was wrong of me.

thefadd.

Tue May 13, 2008 at 05:28:37 AM EST

none

Hey--what's wrong with Huey Lewis?! Their undisputed masterpiece is hip to be square, a song so catchy, most people probably don't listen to the lyrics. But they should, because it's not just about the pleasures of conformity, and the importance of trends, it's also a personal statement about the band itself.

It is easy to buy small plaster models of what you think life is like.

15

^ 14

Hey, Paul.

permazorch.

Wed May 14, 2008 at 03:19:58 AM EST

5.00 (brilliant)

YEEAAAGHH!!!!
-shplud!-

And don't forget Phil Collins, unless you haven't a pulse, ears or heart.
In Too Deep is the most moving pop song of the 1980s, about monogamy and commitment. The song is extremely uplifting. Their lyrics are as positive and affirmative as anything I've heard in rock. Christy, get down on your knees so Sabrina can see your asshole. Phil Collins' solo career seems to be more commercial and therefore more satisfying, in a narrower way. Especially songs like In the Air Tonight and Against All Odds. Sabrina, don't just stare at it, eat it. But I also think Phil Collins works best within the confines of the group, than as a solo artist, and I stress the word artist. This is Sussudio, a great, great song, a personal favorite.

----- The earth may fail, but we will quiver

16

^ 15

Re: Hey, Paul.

T Slothrop.

Wed May 14, 2008 at 01:23:54 PM EST

none

I was wondering how long it would take for someone to bring the inestimable Patrick Bateman into this.

This is not an exit.

{Insert amusing quotation here}

6

In Which I Confess My Love for the Mekons

MC Nally.

Fri May 09, 2008 at 09:32:36 PM EST

5.00 (astute)

After 30 years in (and often screwed by) the music business they never became superstars but three decades in and they're still going as prolific genre-hopping side-project-spawning veterans of the biz.  I give you:  the Mekons.

Cursed with bad record-company relations just as they reached their peak (in many fans' opinions) with their 1989 album "Rock 'n' Roll" that album and its 1991 follow-up "The Curse of the Mekons" deserved to be runaway successes -- instead record label A&M decided not to release Curse in the USA -- fans resorted to expensive European imports but the album which should have greatly broadened the band's appeal never had a chance.

In recent years the band members, transplanted to Chicago, have been mostly active via solo albums and side-projects, ranging from hard-rocking alternative country (Mekon Jon Langford's "Waco Brothers" project) to albums of childrens' songs (released as the "Wee Hairy Beasties") but the Mekons remain active more than thirty years after their first single was released and I still get asked, just about any time I spin one of their records for someone else, "Who was that?"

I would never consider them "blunders" but they're pretty clearly destined to be one of those for-fans-only bands that go entire careers flying beneath the pop-culture radar.

8

Not sure if he counts...

T Slothrop.

Sat May 10, 2008 at 12:55:12 AM EST

5.00

... because he did have one hit, from his very first album.

But damn it's been a nearly 20-year dry spell since then.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Mr. Aimee Mann, Sean's older brother, Michael Penn.

His lyrics are literate, multi-syllabic poetry. His music is either straight-ahead power pop or brooding and introspectively acoustic, but either variant fairly bristles with unshakable hooks.

But for whatever reason, after No Myth nobody gave a damn save a small, deeply-disturbed following of foaming rabid fans.

Grrr.

{Insert amusing quotation here}

17

Cautionary Tales

uncarved block.

Wed May 14, 2008 at 02:54:04 PM EST

5.00 (brilliant, funny)

    It's not always bad that bands stay under the national radar, IMO. For instance, there's no telling the amount of damage these losers might have done to rock if they'd ever gotten traction outside of New York. Fortunately, fans had the good sense to recognize a punk boy band when they saw one, and their career stagnated.

Ex ignorantia ad sapientiam; e luce ad tenebras

1

The Samples

thefadd.

Thu May 08, 2008 at 06:14:05 PM EST

none

One of my favorite bands ever is The Samples. I did a write-up for them once on plastic but it never got out of the subQ because everyone was all who the fuck is this. The friendliest comment was jbou's "Wow, I didn't know anyone outside my home town knew those guys existed." They were quietly massively popular when I was in college (other side of the country from their hometown) so I was kinda surprised more people weren't open to them. They're hardly a blunder, in fact, they're still great. I suppose they're happy with the below the radar success they have...I can't think of any other reason why they wouldn't have had at least one big time hit in their decade plus, like that crapfest Ben Folds.

It is easy to buy small plaster models of what you think life is like.

2

one band come to mind immediately

1fastdog.

Thu May 08, 2008 at 06:24:34 PM EST

none

The Libertines. While they enjoyed some moderate success in the UK, and were for awhile very loudly trumpeted as the Next. Big. Thing., Pete Doherty's drug problems and his tabloidesque relationship with Kate Moss ultimately scuppered whatever potential that the band might've had...

Somewhere in my soul, there's always Rock -n- Roll... Joe Strummer

3

Re: None Hit Blunders

ivyafire.

Thu May 08, 2008 at 07:41:56 PM EST

none

I did a little research to find out what happened to these guys.

Many years ago, in another life I married someone who grew up with these guys, and when we visited his family for the holidays we went to see them play.  They were the ultimate good time bar band, and whenever we visited KC,MO, if they were playing, we were there.

IMO, anything they did once they got the Polygram contract sucked ass.  I was surprised to find they played Europe after we thought they had dropped off the face of the earth.    

I think what really happened was, they just weren't meant for the mainstream.  They were not necessarily good, but they were fun.   I don't think that translated so well into the music business.

I used to really like these guys but I don't know what happened to them.  They had a female lead singer and a more bluesy sound, now they're all twangy, ugh.   I translated it over to MP3 and got rid of the tape a while back, so I'll never know who she was or what happened to her, but what a voice she had.   I'm glad I thought to do that before the tape completely fell apart.  If you click on the link you can't hear any of that from what they're doing now.  

I don't get to hear bar bands in person now, just when people send me cds and tapes.  All the bar bands here play hulas and Jimmy Buffet type stuff the tourists want to hear. :(    

"It was an ancient rule of Hawaiians that no one should hurt another bodily, or through theft of goods or through injury to feelings.These were the only sins."

4

Where the idea came from

Steve Urkel.

Fri May 09, 2008 at 04:27:51 PM EST

none

I was listening to one of the cable music channels and I heard this song "Leader of the Band" from "The Lost Album" by a guy called Lewis Taylor.

9

Frank Zappa & The Mothers Of Invention

MayorBob.

Sat May 10, 2008 at 02:18:16 AM EST

none

Not what you'd call a band with a rich history of hits, but one which nonetheless was one of the most interesting, amusing and entertaining groups ever.  I still have my copy of "We're Only In It For The Money" I bought lo those many decades ago.

Illegitimi non carborundum.

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