Diary

Fun with Mechanicry

DEMachina.

Posted to Diary on Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 03:36:50 PM EST. RSS.

Working on cars is one of those things I wish I knew a lot more about.

It seems like every male over the age of 35 knows a lot about cars, and a lot of those younger.  Somehow I seem to have missed that part of my education.

Take this past weekend, for example.  My girlfriend and I took her aged car back to my parents' place for the Fourth.  Since my dad has a garage, I figured I'd take care of a much-needed oil change on my girlfriend's car.  Bought the stuff after having the auto parts store look up how much oil it needs (since the owner's manual is MIA).

July 5th.  I get the thing up on the ramps my dad owns for this purpose, find the drain plug for the oil pan and drain it.  Fine.  Next I go hunting for the oil filter.  It's a small (1.9L) engine, and they tend to put them in bizarre places.  So when I see the tell-tale cylindrical orange thing sticking out in a fairly awkward place, I'm not especially surprised.  I manage to get the thing off by hand (which you're supposed to be able to do with an oil filter), and drain the blackish gunk that comes out into the container we have for used oil.

Then I try to put the new oil filter on.  Try as I might, it leaves about a 1/4 inch gap between the engine housing and the filter.  Of course, I don't see this because of all the shadows (like I said, it's buried in the engine) and only discover the gap after turning the engine on and hearing a splattering sound.  Oops.

So, there's more black stuff everywhere...nuts, I guess that means I just wasted a quart or two of oil.  I call the auto store back to make sure they gave me the right filter: it looks like the threads don't quite line up.

Eventually, after consulting with my dad when he gets home, it turns out that orange cylindrical object was the transmission filter.  Figures.  So we put the old one of those back on, and plan on making another trip to the auto parts store to replace all the AT fluid that's now on the floor of my dad's garage.

We finally manage to find the damned oil filter, and it turns out it's on the passenger's side, above the suspension, directly over the CV boot.  And of course the lackey at whatever oil change place she'd gone to back in December cranked the thing on there but good, so it takes us the better part of a day (after buying a chain-based wrench) to get the thing off.  Pour some more transmission fluid in there and the car's running better now than it was when we started.

It seems like mine was a pretty honest mistake, since it's so rare to find external transmission filters, and the thing was so covered in grime that there was no way to see the faded "transmission" written on it.  Then combine that with the fact that the stuff that came out of there was black with a slight red tinge.

I'd love to learn how to do more maintenance myself, both because I love tinkering and because it'd save me a fortune.

So, do any of you have any good car maintenance disasters to share?  And how did you learn to do what you know how to do?

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1

Re: Fun with Mechanicry

keta.

Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 05:07:14 PM EST

none

Your post is exactly why I've never wanted to, or intend to, work on cars.

As a spatial-relationship-challenged individual, I'm often a marvel at taking things apart, and completely at sea trying to put them back together.  Knowing these limitations, I now never take anything apart - anything - unless there's someone nearby to put it to rights.

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More bad news

Lou.

Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 06:00:10 PM EST

none

Ummm, I think tranny fluid supposed to be red...sort of like cherry syrup.  And yours was black?  Back in my amateur wrenching days brownish red or even cloudy tranny fluid was considered a sign of danger below.

Don't feel bad.  I once spent the better part of a night in my father-in-law's (now ex) replacing the tie rods on my beetle...when all I really needed to do was have the tires balanced.

I think this is how most of the amateur/weekend stuff goes.  You start a project with the right parts, the right manual and all the best intentions.  12 hours later you wind up sitting on the garage floor in a sea of parts thinking, "how the fuck did I get here."

That being said, I don't think I would have made it through college without Pell Grants, student loans, canned soup, and the best book ever written.  (I still have my lovingly grease-stained copy even though I haven't owned a bug in over 20 years.)

It's the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine

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Re: More bad news

DEMachina.

Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 09:18:39 PM EST

none

Ummm, I think tranny fluid supposed to be red...sort of like cherry syrup.  And yours was black?  Back in my amateur wrenching days brownish red or even cloudy tranny fluid was considered a sign of danger below.

Of that I have no doubt.  This car is something ... the odometer stopped working at 198,000 miles or so, and that was before my girlfriend got ahold of it (which was 2 years ago).  We figure it's probably sitting on around 225,000 miles right now.  She's just trying to keep it running until she's done with law school (another 1.5 years or so), although I think I'm more maintenance conscious about it than she is.  I just worry about it dying somewhere at night or something (she has triple-A, at least).

I have to give Saturn credit that the thing still runs...as far as we know it's the original engine, and quite possibly the original transmission.  I know it sat in a family friend's yard for a time before it was given to my girlfriend (I think all she had to do was get a new fuel pump and flush the injectors, maybe some tires too, I don't remember).

Your description of amateur stuff is pretty apt.  I remarked to the gf on our drive back to Richmond that invariably when I try a do-it-yourself project Murphy's law is in full effect.  This applies even to computers, which I'm way more comfortable with than cars.  One of the reasons I'll never try loading my own ammunition!

Q: What do you think of western civilization? Gandhi: I think it would be a good idea.

3

I Can Change A Battery

thefadd.

Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 06:23:56 PM EST

none

...but that's about it. Two things I have enough of a knowledge about to know what I don't know but wish I knew more: cars and computers.

It is easy to buy small plaster models of what you think life is like.

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Re: I Can Change A Battery

DEMachina.

Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 09:21:14 PM EST

none

Computers are the new tinkerer's joy, I think.  I'm lucky enough to have grown up at that time when you had to know what you were doing in order to use the things, but they were simple enough you could teach yourself easily.

I figure that's part of why I'm useless when it comes to cars...I never did that much with them growing up, so never really learned how they work.

Q: What do you think of western civilization? Gandhi: I think it would be a good idea.

4

Re: Fun with Mechanicry

MayorBob.

Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 07:14:09 PM EST

none

My father's first new car he ever owned was a 1965 Buick (before that, he always had a company car).  When he logged 5,000 miles I offered to do an oil change for him.  He refused telling me he only wanted professionals touching his car.  So he arranged for the dealership to do the oil change.  He comes back from the dealer and parked the car in the driveway.  When I went out an hour later there was a pool of liquid on the pavement.  I asked him what that was and he said it probably was normal seepage.  I said I didn't think that much oil would seep if the job was done properly.  He said I probably didn't know what I was talking about and just shut up.

The next morning he gets up and starts up the car which makes it all the way up the street before the oil light goes on.  He had the car towed to the dealer and they discovered the "professional" had put the wrong sized oil filter back on and the filter hadn't properly sealed.  So much for leaving things in the hands of professionals.  

Illegitimi non carborundum.

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Re: Fun with Mechanicry

DEMachina.

Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 09:25:32 PM EST

none

Yeah, I don't really trust dealers' competence either.  A dealer busted the battery in my dad's pickup a couple years ago and then tried to charge him for it after admitting that they had done it (seems when they admitted it they thought it was under warranty, then realized it wasn't...oops).

That reminds me of a story one of the guys at the auto parts store told us when we were there the other night.  Apparently some models of Mitsubishi not only have external transmission filters, the pans for the transmission fluid have a regular drain plug on the bottom, just like the oil.  Apparently a customer went to have their oil changed, and after that the transmission kept slipping.  Turns out the oil change place had drained the transmission fluid and then added more oil; so he was driving around with no transmission fluid and twice the amount of oil.  I'm amazed he didn't need a new engine after that.

I always approach those places with extreme trepidation: they use low-quality oil and filters and tend not to really know what they're doing (overfilling is pretty common from what I understand, which is of course horrible for the car).

Q: What do you think of western civilization? Gandhi: I think it would be a good idea.

8

Re: Fun with Mechanicry

zyxwvutsr.

Tue Jul 08, 2008 at 10:51:35 PM EST

none

You don't need no stinkin' "chain-based wrench." You get a stout flathead screwdriver, and a hammer of some sort, and you pound the screwdriver through the oil filter and use that for leverage. Of course if that doesn't do the trick you're screwed because you have a stuck oil filter with a hole in it. But it'll usually work.

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Re: Fun with Mechanicry

DEMachina.

Wed Jul 09, 2008 at 12:33:30 AM EST

none

Yeah, that was going to be our last resort, 'cause you end up spraying oil everywhere, plus you can end up totally shredding the filter which makes it even harder to get out.

Q: What do you think of western civilization? Gandhi: I think it would be a good idea.

10

^ 8

Re: Fun with Mechanicry

thefadd.

Wed Jul 09, 2008 at 12:35:38 AM EST

none

I picked up one of those handy socket wrenches and that always seems to give me the room and leverage I need. Then again, all I know how to do is change a battery. And the taillights.

It is easy to buy small plaster models of what you think life is like.

11

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Re: Fun with Mechanicry

DEMachina.

Wed Jul 09, 2008 at 06:29:01 PM EST

none

Yeah...unfortunately it's awkwardly placed on that car, plus whoever changed it last overtightened it, which means it got still tighter because of the vibrations of the car running.

Q: What do you think of western civilization? Gandhi: I think it would be a good idea.

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