I once saw a sausage that looked like my dick.

Now see...when I look at that, I see something like this.

It's the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine

I'll see you, and raise you JESUS WOOD.

Ostroff's heart started to race after finding the foot-long image of what she believes to be Jesus on the round slab of a sycamore tree cut down from her Brandywine Hundred backyard in 1996.

Ever since, viewing the object inspires Ostroff, 54, especially when life hasn't been as easy as she'd hoped.

"I call it my Jesus Wood, and it's been comforting," she says.

I think I prefer to live in the world where people see the Virgin Mother instead of a spellbound Dementor.